Two years ago she whispered
I felt her
She was like magic inside of me
I fell in love immediately
I knew her
She was so magnificent
My heart burst with love
She only stayed a short while
A handful of weeks
But she changed my life forever
The inner and the outer deeply transformed by her presence
I was sharing in an interview today about the effects on my life of the baby who visited me 2 years ago, how she changed my world from the inside out. After all, that is one of the deepest forms of alchemy possible, she was growing inside of my body. She changed me in ways that no one else possibly could have.
With her presence, I experienced a love and compassion that I had only ever dreamt of before, when she left those qualities deepened even further in me. She activated a certain quality within me that said no to any further fragmentation, it became impossible to live a segmented life. Anything that I had suppressed – trauma, magnificence, creativity, power, feelings of all varieties – they all came up for expression through me after she left.
Her presence created an activation from the inside out, and from that time on nothing in me could be left unattended. I needed to deepen my inner listening and come into greater alignment than I had ever felt before.
She brought new lessons in self care and boundaries. I realised that I would have changed my life for her, and that demonstrated to me where I needed to change my life for me.
I can see why she came into my life when she did, some days my heart still aches a little, and yet overall, there is incredible peace for having known her. This precious soul who gifted me with so many lessons in such a short space of time. And just some days I wonder what she would have looked like.
Her gifts keep on giving, I am still learning and integrating her presence in my life. I do wonder how parents manage to keep up with the lessons via physical children, when I am still integrating the lessons from a soul who was never born.